Tatum, J Michael Tatum
by geekofbakerstreet
Summary: Tatum is in a room when he gets a strange note. Suddenly, characters he's voiced appears! Now Tatum and his voices are on a misson to figure out what is going on! (Terrible Summary. Anyways, this only includes SOME characters. Scar, Kyoya, Erwin, France, and Sebastian only. Warnings: Swears, France, Spoilers, and OOC, and CRACK!)
1. Chapter 1: Notes and Voices

(TATUM POOOOOOV)

I looked around the spacious office room, wondering where the fuck everyone was.

"Uh, Dani?" I call, making sure my receptionist wasn't playing a trick on me.

"What the hell…" I whisper to myself.

"Uh, Brina? Jerry? Someone?!" I shout.

My voice just echoes off the room. There aren't any windows, a giant ceiling fan hangs overhead, and a long wooden table with a bunch of black swivel chairs sit next to the table. The floor is oak, I think. I see a note at the table's head.

"What the…" I walk over to it.

The letters look like that of an old typewriter and the letters are a dark red. The scripture reads,

'Dear JMT,

The next events prior to reading this will make no sense whatsoever. But you _are _an actor, after all, you've probably been through worse. Look to the way you came. You will notice, if you run to the double doors, that they are locked.'

_What? _I think.

I run to the double doors. I pull them but they _are _locked. I look at the note.

'See? We told you. Not important. Anyways, you know that thing you always say? To people who ask you your favorite character? 'I can't choose just one because they're all apart of me and if I say one the others will be in my mind saying you're a bastard!'? Well, let's just say some...parts of you will be coming. Enjoy your time.

NVCR

-E + S'

"Okay that's not weird at all...E and S? NVCR? What the heck?!" I shout.

I sigh and stuff the note into my jean pocket and run a hand through my hair. I hear a dripping noise and notice red liquid dripping from the ceiling onto the desk. Confused, I walk over to the spot. Words. There are words dripping from the ceiling.

'Oh...By ThE wAy, tHiS mIgHt HuRt…' The words spell. Suddenly, a headache hits me like a freight train. I yell in pain and claw at my hair. Then I notice something...odd. Shadows of figures seem to be in the same position I am, crying out in pain. But their voices strike me as the most odd. They're _my _voice. The pain finally stops.

"Mon dieu…"

"Bloody hell…"

"For the love of Maria…"

"Ow…"

"For the love of Ishval…"

I hear a few of my many voices chorus.

"What the hell…" I say to myself.

I look up. Yep, I must be dead. Standing there, in flesh and blood, are my perverted Frenchmen, demon butler, bushy browed commander of humanity's last hope, my cool typed Host Club member, and my scar faced Ishvalan.

Dead. That's what I am. Dead.

"Who the bloody hell are all of you?!" Sebastian asked, obviously shocked.

"Hon hon hon, stuck in a room with one of Britain's men, two dashing black haired men, a blond haired man who could rival Britain in eyebrows and an albino. I could get used to this…~" Purrs France.

"Who the heck is Britain?!" Erwin shouts.

"Can someone explain what the hell is going on?!" Shouts Kyoya.

"I agree with silver eyes." Scar annonces.

"Britain is a country, you idiot." Sighs Sebastian.

"No, he's a personification!" Insists France.

"Can everyone just calm down?" Erwin says.

"Yeah, shut up." Scar grunts.

"Excuse moi, but _I _didn't use magic or whatever to bring me to this room."

"Magic?! Magic doesn't exist! Seriously, how dumb are you?" Kyoya asks, obviously irritated.

"Magic? No no no, this is one of Hanji's experiments isn't it?" Erwin elaborates.

"Hanji? Magic? No, this is obviously alchemy!" Argues Scar.

"Demons...damn, was it Claude? Or maybe that bubble brain Grell…" Sebastian says mostly to himself.

The fighting gets louder and louder. I finally snap back from my jaw dropped, eye popping awe that _anime characters _were standing in front of me.

"EVERYONE SHUT THE HELL UP!" I shout.

The room quiets and their eyes are on me. God this is weird. I take a deep breath.

"Good. Alright this isn't demons, or alchemy, or Hanji or anything else. I am your voice actor." I say.

A dramatic silence hangs in the air.

"Hon hon hon, no one can voice me, I am a country." France pipes up.

"Wanna bet?" I challenge, raising an eyebrow.

"Fine, not like it can happen anyway." France scoffs, smirking at me.

I cough for dramatic effect.

"I'm Sebastian Michaelis who stuck being a demon butler for a brat for all eternity." I announce in Sebastian's voice.

Sebastian's wine red eyes widen.

"I'm commander Erwin and I'm bossed around by a midget who has an obsession with cleaning."

"I'm Scar and I might as well be Batman."

"Kyoya Ootori of Ouran Highschool Host Club bitches!"

And I lastly, looking directly at France.

"Hon hon hon, welcome to my conversation panel!" I say eccentrically, posing.

The characters look at me, eyes as big as quarters and and mouths hanging open.

I smirk. "Now…" I say, walking to the head of the desk, hand trailing the glossy surface.

I sit in the chair and kick up my black sneaker clad feet on the table and cross them, along with crossing my arms.

"Let's talk about how we all got here."

* * *

><p><strong>Geek: Short chapter, SHORT CHAPTER. -_- fudge a duck...anyways, first chapter! Sorry this wasn't all that interesting. More to come! Obviously, I won't try to spoil much, and if I do, I'll put a spoiler warning up. Make sure to leave a review~! Also! I do not own any of the animes or mangas used, or the Tatum. This is all from my deranged mind. You know, that part that rocks back and forth with a tin foil hat on. :D<strong>


	2. Chapter 2: Arm and Greet

It still freaked me out that the characters I acted were here. They were animated Japanese characters. Not real, flesh-and-blood people. And yet, here they are, France sitting to my right, Scar leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, Sebastian sitting upright to my left, Erwin standing up with his arms crossed, and Kyoya sitting to Sebastian's right.

"So, mind explaining what you mean by _voices? _God, you aren't insane are you?" Scoffs Scar.

I raise an eyebrow and adjust my glasses.

"No, I'm not insane...I think. Anyways, I voice act you. You, at least in my world, are anime and or manga characters. Sebastian is from Black Butler, Kyoya is from Ouran Highschool Host Club, Erwin is from Attack on Titan, France is from Hetalia, and Scar is from Fullmetal Alchemist." I explain.

"...Anime?" Questions Erwin.

"What's a manga?" Scar asks.

"I agree with...those two." Sebastian says.

"Oh...anime and manga? Hm, I think Japan mentioned it once…" France trails off, as if trying to recall the memory.

"That's the stuff Renge is obsessed with right?" Asks Kyoya.

I rub the bridge of my nose and sigh.

"Okay, it's like a story with moving pictures for those out of time. And let's get introduced, otherwise it's going to be really freaking confusing. I'm J. Michael Tatum, I voice act all of you." I look over to Sebastian.

He stands up and bows.

"Sebastian Michaelis of the Phantomhive Manor, demon butler." He greets, before sitting back down.

Kyoya's glasses lens flares and he smirks.

"Kyoya Ootori of Ouran Academy and management of the Host Club."

Erwin put a fist over his heart and another on his back in salute.

"Erwin Smith of the Scouting Legion, HA!" He roll calls.

Scar glares at us. "Scar. Survivor of Ishval."

France winks and smiles. "Bonjour, I am France! Or Francis Bonnefoy, if that works~."

"Alright, now that we know each other, can we ask why the hell a crate just _appeared?!_" Scar says, gesturing to a wooden chest.

I get up out of my chair. "That...wasn't there before…" I mumble.

"Well, who's got the guts to open it?" Asks Erwin.

"Well….YOLO." I announce, walking to said crate.

"...Forget I ever said that." I declare.

I sit on my knees and take a deep breath. I flip open the lid and...nothing. No explosion or immediate death. Nothing. The chest was full of random packages.

"We got presents!" I shouted in a manly way.

I started handing them out to each character. All the names were written in a typewriter format in a dark red. A note was strapped to mine.

'Tatum- Open yours alone. -S+E NVCR' I arched an eyebrow.

_Yeah nope. Not trusting with that._ I think.

Sebastian rips his open which opens to many silver knives.

He chuckles darkly. "I like this weapon~..."

Scar opens his which is a book for alchemy. "Hm. Okay."

Kyoya's opens to a...pen. But when he clicks it. "Holy shiiiiiit!" He yells.

The pen is now a silvery sword. He clicks it the handle of the sword and it's back to being a pen.

"Mon dieu, what is with all the weapons?" France has a huge box. He opens it and…

"Que se passe-t-il? Un FR F2?!" He shouts, pulling out the sniper rifle.

And a ton of ammo. Erwin's box is with two fold out 3-D Maneuver swords.

"What's in yours, Michael?" Asks Erwin.

The group of men turn to me. A note on regular notebook paper in red typewriter font scrawls a note. I cough.

"To JMT. These are weapons. You do not know why. You will. Anyways, these are the weaknesses of all the characters in the room. Also a weapon for yourself. Be warned, be warned.

-E+S" I read aloud.

A stunned silence fills the room.

"If you wish to open it, Mr. Tatum, I do not blame you." Assures Sebastian.

"You have every reason to be afraid. We did come to your world. If it were switched, I would be worried as well." Sebastian continues.

I take a deep breath and rip it open. A pair of garden shears, a small notebook with the French national flag on it, a black book that reads, 'Ootori Family History By: Yoshio Ootori'. An iron cross, and a tape recorder. A dark red stone and a pistol sit in the box too.

"Here." Scar says simply, tossing me a black book bag.

"Uh, thanks." I say.

I pack everything up.

"While you were doing whatever you were, staring at that stuff, doors appeared." Kyoya says, pointing to some metal double doors.

"Why didn't you tell me?!" I ask.

He just smirks and shrugs. I roll my eyes.

"Alright," I announce, standing up.

"You guys ready?" I say, looking at them.

They all nod as I walk to the doors and push them open.

* * *

><p><strong>Geek: SHIZA, THAT WAS SHORT. Oh, translation:<strong>

**Que se passe-t-il? Un FR F2? = What the hell? A FR F2?!**

**And yes, I did have to look up what an FR F2 is. It's a machine sniper gun made in France which is still used today. And I feel bad for not posting this sooner, so internet hug! In case you haven't noticed, this is a crack fic. I get bored. Fairly easily. I promise the chapter will be longer next time and not suck! Bye! Hope you have a good day!**


	3. Chapter 3: Disturbia

**Geek: Just before I start, there will be a smidgen of character shaming, and obviously I love these characters. Along with Nightcore, I listen to that and it's fairly well done. So to clear up any confusion :D**

* * *

><p>"Alright then…" I whisper.<p>

The outside is basically an office on drugs. Cubicles that are labeled with things like, 'Things You See In The Dark' and 'That Guy That Just Walks Into A Room And Annoys You' or 'Remind Me To Kill Steve'. The carpet is a bright purple and yellow. There are windows, but it just shows a bright blue sky and unnaturally puffy clouds.

_So jumping out isn't an option… _I think bitterly.

"What the hell?" Scar yells.

"Excuse me, don't take my home's name in vain!" Argues Sebastian, crossing his arms and looking indifferent. "Mortals."

"You forget moi! I'm not human." France corrects.

Sebastian rolls his eyes and sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Okay, Batman, Demon Boy, Man Slut, calm down." I say.

"Hey!" France, Sebastian, and Scar shout.

I roll my eyes. "Bitch please."

"Shut up." Erwin commands.

"Screw you, Leaf Brows!" I shout.

"No seriously, shut up. I think I hear something." Erwin says.

Our group quiet and we hear...music?

"Sounds like Nightcore…" I say.

"Nightcore?" Kyoya asks, turning to me.

"Songs that my fans like. Hyped up versions of popular songs." I explain.

"Oh." He nods.

"That annoying music is coming from there." Scar points to a room that's flashing many bright colors.

And female giggling echos from the room.

"Honhonhonhonhon~, girls..." France laughs.

Kyoya, Scar, Erwin, and France start to walk to the door. I do too, but Sebastian pauses.

"...Hm…" Sebastian mumbles, deep in thought.

"What's up, Sebastian?" I ask, tilting my head.

"Well-"

"Uh, you might want to see this, Michael and Sebastian!" Yells Erwin.

We rush to the cydelic room.

* * *

><p>"Um…" Sebastian says intelligently.<p>

France, Kyoya, Erwin, and Scar, including Sebastian and myself, stand in the doorway, absolutely shocked.

Six girls are dancing on a disco floor, all laughing. They dance to 'Timber'. The floor flashes a bunch of colors, that gives me a headache. A disco ball twirls on the ceiling, and a concession table and DJ system sit in a corner.

"It's goin' down, I'm yellin' timber~! You better move, you better dance. Let's make a night, you won't remembe-er, I'll be the one, you won't forget~!" The girls sing to the song.

They look familiar...

"Holy shit…" I breathe.

"Guys...they're us…" I say, my eyes widening.

The song tones down and the girls notice us.

The main girl wears square glasses and a smirk. Her lips a light pink,her hair is spiked and dark brown. Her eyes were a light brown. She wears jean shorts and a dark blue tee shirt. A watch is on her right wrist and her ears are pierced with silver studs.

_Is she...me? _I think.

I look over to see another girl, her face twisted in disgust. Her dark red eyes are fierce and a 'X' scar crossed her tan face. Her white hair was also spiked up and a light gray. She wears a red sash like shirt that makes an 'X' over her shirt, the tattoo I guess her sister gave her. Her white jeggings are ripped and her black combat boots only make her look more intimidating. Two silver earring hang on her left ear, a stub on her lobe and another near the top.

"Who the hell are you?" She asks, looking us up and down.

A girl with wine red eyes and her raven hair is combed over to the left of her head and reaches down to her chest. She wears a black vest, a white dress shirt, and a black tie. Her dark gray pencil skirt that stops at her legs, which are covered in black tights and ox blood highheels.

"Calm down, Scar." She warns, glaring at Sebastian.

"Give me a break, _Maid._" Female Scar says, rolling her eyes.

Female Sebastian flinched.

"How _dare _you-"

A girl with oval glasses, piercing silver eyes, and long black hair pulled into a ponytail.

Her outfit was a dark blue pencil skirt, high heels, a bright blue blazer (Ouran Academy issued), a gray tie and a white blouse.

"Let's not fight, Michaels and Scar. We have to talk with them." Fem Kyoya advises.

"I agree with Ootori." A strong female voice proclaims.

I see a pixie cut, blonde hair, blue eyed female version of Erwin come into view. She wears the regular Scouting Legion uniform, but in female version.

"Let them fight, Win. I want to see how this goes~..." A French accented voice purrs.

A girl comes out from the back. Her light purple eyes are half lidded, and a smile is on her light pink lips. Her shimmering blond hair is in a bun and her bangs are long. A gold tiara sits on her head delicately, and her royal purple cloak flutters behind her, a fleur-de-lis symbol on the back of the cloak. Her dark blue business shirt hugs her curves and her white skirt flitting around softly. Her black socks reach up to her knees and her boots aren't close behind.

"Mon dieu it's me!" France exclaims.

Francine's violet eyes flitted to her male counterpart. A smirk played on her lips.

"Honhonhon~, I look handsome as a man, non?" She winks.

"Whatever Francey Pants." Nyo Me says, rolling her eyes.

I look over to Sebastian. He seems to be having a glaring contest with...I'm calling her Adrianna, because reasons.

"This isn't logical…" Kyoya murmurs, shifting his glasses.

"Agreed." Nyo Kyoya's face in a perplexed expression.

"Odd." Irwin, or female Erwin says.

"Indeed." Erwin replies.

"...Michael." Sebastian growls, looking at me...nervously?

Whatever can make a demon nervous must be bad…

"Yeah...what?" I ask.

Adrianna glared at her male self. Her eyes glinted murderously. Then her mouth quirked up into a smirk, revealing sharpened teeth.

"They don't have souls." Sebastian says seriously.

"That's a little harsh." I say, crossing my arms.

"No, he's right." Nyo Me smiles, her teeth are now like spears and her eyes glint with an insane light.

"Can we stop stalling and kill them now?!" Screeches Nyo Scar.

Nyo Erwin's eyes flash with a twisted light. "Of course!" She laughs.

I notice that the DJ system shimmers with a purple and blue light and 'Disturbia' By: Rihanna kicks on.

Nyo Me licks her lips. And the soulless girls lunge.


End file.
